August 1, 2006

I know, I know... I have had several "prompts" for an update and have failed miserably. Seems as though life has been a tailspin for me, between teaching summer school (second grade regular education and LOVED it!), starting a new job at Gundersen Lutheran Medical Center, and trying to be a good parent to my children, wife to my husband, and caregiver to the animals.

Summer school came to an end on Friday, July 21. That afternoon John Lyons pulled in with is wife, Jody, their motor home, and their two horses, Charlie and Preacher. I also cannot forget to mention their two dogs! I coasted in my driveway to find my wonderful family (mother in law Sandee, husband Craig, sister in law Cherie and her children and my own) making things as beautiful as possible on the farm. Our porch was painted, the barn painted inside and out, fences straightened, arena panels uprighted, indoor arena cleaned, and we were finally ready for the big day when John Lyons would arrive. People came and went those who had heard John would be pulling in at 3 pm... but John and Jodydid not arrive until after 5:30 pm. When they did pull up a shriek from the group of children anticipating their arrival alerted us. We quieted the children and asked them to wait by the house so John and Jody would not be overwhelmed right away! They ended up parking next door at the home of our neighbors Richie and Michelle (thank you Phillips family!) - a much more private spot. Knees shaking, we greeted John and Jody. John's firm handshake calmed me, and his laid back attitude reassured me that all was going to be fine. We went to work with John and Jody, putting u banners and setting up tables in the arena. One of Jody's friends from La Crosse drove up and the fellowship began.

Volunteers also were at our farm from Minnesota, and we were blessed with a man who is a professional chef and owns his own restaurant in the Twin Cities, and the head chef from the Hyatt-Regency in the Twin Cities! Before we knew it we were making plans for a cook-out in our very own yard!!! What a feast we had that night - antelope, red deer, steak, grilled vegetables, potatoes! And to think I was eating dinner with John and Jody Lyons and friends! It was a perfect evening, stars shining and warm weather.

John and Jody Lyons, Susan and Craig Wellman, and Candy Speed (Tanah Marah Farms) on Saturday, July 22 after the fund raising clinic.

John and Jody retired to the motorhome and we knew the next day would bring many hours of hard work. Our day started at 6 am. Thanks to my wonderful family we had many people in place for the event. Also I want to thank Mike Wiese, Dee Dunbar, Danielle Strom (I didn't even get a chance to talk to you!!!), Kim Strachan, Sandee and Gene Wellman, Cherie Fritz and Erin, Ethan Stilwell (our right arm here at the farm), Marisa Buros, Molly Engford and her parents, and all the people responsible for sponsoring this fund raiser mentioned in the program at the clinic. Thanks especially to Andrea and Comfortex Mattress Company, we were able to pay John Lyons in full and still have some money left over to pay for port-a-potty rental, barn fan rental, and chair rentals. If it were NOT for Andrea and Comfortex or the contributions of people such as Barb and Scott Edwards and the many people who donated money for youth to attend, we would have been in the hole. Only because of all of you, we came out ahead and the horses will be provided for! Thank you thank you! We are already planning on having John and Jody back next year... so we should be even more prepared and more well-organized!

The Genoa Lions Club provided lunch and were able to have a successful sale and made money for their civic organization. Tabby Town, a local cat rescue, also had a bake sale and raffle here that day which was successful. Our silent auction and raffle was also successful and t-shirt sales went well. Thank you to everyone!

While all of this was going on, there were many things behind the scenes that were pulling at my heartstrings and I allowed it to cause a small meltdown on Sunday. Last Thursday while cleaning out the arena Craig almost piled over four newborn kittens between some bales of hay he was moving in the arena. They were small and cold.....but we thought that leaving them in the arena was the right thing to do. I got a kennel cab and put them in, then waited for whatever feral mom may show up to feed them. I went to school the next day and came home, only to find the kittens untouched and unfed, colder than ever. Our helper Ethan said he had a mother cat who may feed them up at his farm, so Craig and Ethan took the kittens up to the ridge and within hours the kittens were back, rejected. I knew it was time to feed, so off to the store I rushed to pick up kitten replacement formula. Feed, clean, feed, clean...

As if this were not enough, Asha decided to take a turn for the worse around Friday of last week. For those of you who do not remember, Asha has been with us for over five years now. A Quarter horse/Arab/Appaloosa cross, Asha was the perfect lesson horse, therapy horse... she blessed us with Cricket who I have shared about in past updates over the years. Asha has Cushings Disease, and the past year has been a challenge to keep her going. She is much slower to move and needs a closely supervised environment to make sure she is fed enough and watched. We had managed the symptoms of her Cushings successfully up until last week, when she could no longer use her legs. It appears as though it is so painful for her to walk that she just plants her legs and won't move. She also is laying down quite a bit. After four veterinarians have attended to her and every avenue has been taken to treat her aggressively with antibiotic therapy, banamine, steroids, and countless other attempts, we realize that Asha may not be with us very much longer. On the day of the clinic Asha was down in her stall, breathing heavily due to the high heat and humidity. Ethan did a commendable job of attending to her as she got up, then fell down, then got up, then laid down and stayed there. By the end of the day, I came to realize that Asha was indeed in a life-threatening situation. We called the veterinarian and he prescribed MAJOR treatment to rule out any infection going on in her body somewhere that we could not detect. He also prescribed an IV steroid, which Craig (thank goodness for Craig) was able to get into her vein in her neck. Within ten minutes Asha was back on her feet standing and eating. I thought a miracle had taken place! We thought we were on the mend, but as this week has progressed Asha has developed a temperature, is not sweating, and her respirations are labored. The vet was out agani yesterday, and recommended euthenization. Since this was, again, a new vet seeing Asha, I needed time to consider this. He waited, toe-tapping, until I could not be forced into a quick decision. Meanwhile, Asha nickered and whinnied to us for treats, which made everything so very hard! If only she looked as though she was giving up, as if she wants to die, to leave us and leave this earth...but she doesn't! She keeps looking at us to help her feel better, and yet the ravages of the tumor on her pituitary gland pushing on her brain are causing her guages that regulate respiration and body temperature and leg movement to go crazy. I pray every moment for wisdom to help figure this out, but am I hanging on to nothing? No hope? Have we done all we can for Asha?

Today is supposed to be a very hot day, and I worry for Asha and am prepared to spend the day hosing her down and hoping for the banamine to make her more comfortable. The inevitable may come, and I pray for the strength to make the decision to euthenize. I struggle with playing God GREATLY - my husband gently, ever so gently, encourages me to not let her suffer - not let the flies get to her - but he is backing me up on taking the time to make a thoughtful decision. It was so much easier when Star just laid down and passed peacefully from this earth! Why can't it happen this way for Asha? Oh Lord help me......I am so tired from worry - so sick in my spirit from debate and war with my soul over this. I realize that this part of being director of ASAP is what almost breaks me - almost makes me feel as though I can never go on, never continue... the pain is too great.

I ask your encouragement during this hard time. ASAP affects every part of my family's life each second of every day. We want to go rummage-saleing, we want to go to the Dells and to Valley Fair, we want to go on vacations, we want to just leave the house for a day to go out on the river or fishing, but each of these activities is affected by the horses. We chose it (or did I?)... out of love not money. Lord help us cointinue on!

I promise not to let it go this long next time - be watching as more horses become available!

In His Love,
Susan

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